Memories: Barbara (Maggie's Mother)

It has been 4 years today since my precious daughter, Maggie, died. Four years since I have held her in my arms. Four years since I’ve seen her always magnetic smile. Four years since I have knelt at her bedside for evening prayers.

I was suddenly thrust into every parent’s worst nightmare! The pain was unfathomable! I cried in the shower. I cried at the grocery store. I fell into a heap, sobbing on the kitchen floor. I was paralyzed. I took pills to get through the day. I took pills to sleep at night. I ran as far and as fast from reality as I possibly could.

No one seemed to understand. I prayed till my knees bled… Looking for answers, how many times I cried out, “God, just give me the strength to keep breathing!”

Then one day, Pastor Al said to me, “Maggie knew she was dying and she never let the fear of death keep her from living life!!”

Suddenly, the light went on in my head and in my heart… how could I be so weak when she had lived such a faithful and courageous life in the face of such adversity!!

Tenderly, God opened my eyes and helped me to see that although her life had been short she had done great works while she was here. And now it was my privilege to have the opportunity to spread the legacy of that amazing life! It was God’s plan… All of it!!

Thus, “Maggie’s Angels” was born. As Mary Alice Stephenson so eloquently put it, at Make-A-Wish Wisconsin’s Host Night last spring, “Out of a tragedy, triumph was born.”​

Life is now a “new normal” for me. I still miss her every, every day, but the sting of her death is now replaced with a feeling of pride and accomplishment in the workings of Maggie’s Angels. I pray she will be the first angel I see when I get to heaven and I want her to say, “Good job, Mom. I’m proud of you… and we’ve got a lot of shopping to catch up on.”

To everyone who has ever lost a child, I say…

“Cherish your memories and

believe in the future…

knowing that your child

will be tucked safely

in your heart,

forever and always.”

I love you, Maggie and I am blessed to have been your mom